As I have mentioned before this is the month of Elul in the Hebrew calendar. And the month of Elul is to be a month of self examination and introspection. It seems as if this is not without its biblical presendence…
2Co 13:5 Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you–unless indeed you fail the test?
As I sat back and began to think about how I was going to examine myself I soon realized that was going to be next to impossible. You see, I am a sinful creature. I am a self centered human being. If I were indeed to sit down with myself and examine my life and my faith can you guess what I would say about myself? You are right! “I am doing just fine!” ” I am a great guy!” “God really loves me and all that I do.” “Everyone else is sooooo messed up, if they could all just be more like me.” OY! What a mess sin makes of our lives in so many ways.
So how can I go about doing a true self evaluation of who I am? How can I examine myself and my faith to find areas where I need to correct error or strengthen that which remains and is about to die. (Rev. 3:2) I have found two things that really help me in the area of self examination.
1. I ask God to search me and reveal to me areas where I am falling short. Psalm 26:2 reads, “Examine me, O LORD, and try me; Test my mind and my heart.” I ask God to find ways to illumintate my mind and my heart to areas of improvement. Many time HaShem has placed in front of me scriptures where characteristics of my life that need improving are reflected in the lives of others in the scriptures. It is a clear sign that I need to work on this or that.
2. (And only attempt this one is you are brave and truley ready to hear what people have to say) I go to the people around me that I trust and I ask them if they have noticed in me areas where I need to improve my life and my faith. I also ask if I have wronged them in anyway and ask their forgivenss. Also, I will often do this with my enemies. People who I have been in serious conflict with and often times it has brought reconciliation and better friendship.
Sometimes it really helps to go to people that you have had confliict with (i.e. the enemy) and ask them to give you some suggestions on how you can improve yourself. When I do this kind of exercise I will often have to fight the yetzer hara in me that wants to argue with their conslusions. But, I limit myself to simply saying “Thank you” and that then frees me up to step back and see if indeed they are correct.
This can be a difficult process and it can be very hard to hear the things that people have to say about us. But, it is important since our view of ourselves is skewed by our own sinfullness. But, it can indeed be very beneficial and indeed a great way to bring about the time of repentence and Atonement coming up on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.
